If there’s one thing Gene Simmons has mastered beyond thundering bass riffs and pyrotechnic shows, it’s the art of turning anything — and everything — into a business opportunity. From KISS-branded coffins to comic books, the rock legend has never met a revenue stream he didn’t like. His latest entrepreneurial venture? Charging fans $12,495 for the unique privilege of being his personal roadie for a day.
Yes, you read that right. Instead of receiving a paycheck for lugging gear and standing backstage, fans now fork over five figures to carry Simmons’ metaphorical bags. And while many online scoffed at the idea — calling it a grift, a joke, or just peak Simmons — one fan says it was the best money he’s ever spent.
Meet Dwayne Rosado, a retired corrections officer from Middletown, New York. A lifelong KISS devotee and father of two, Rosado is also living with multiple sclerosis — a diagnosis that changed his perspective on time, money, and what really matters. When he heard about the “Gene Simmons Roadie Experience,” he didn’t hesitate. Not only did he sign up, but he brought along his teenage son, Zach, for the ride.
“This is what I choose to spend my money on,” Rosado told The New York Times. “You only live once, and I want to experience life. I’m not going to die with a lot of money. I’m going to die happy.”
It’s the kind of sentiment you can’t argue with — especially if you’re Gene Simmons. “There’s free market, supply and demand,” he said, brushing off the critics. “You buy a Rolls because you want a Rolls. A Volkswagen will get you there, too.”
That quote might as well be etched into Simmons’ business card. It’s capitalism in face paint: the brand is the product, and Simmons knows exactly what he’s selling — himself.
As for the experience itself? According to NYT reporter Mark Yarm, who followed the Rosados behind the scenes at a Simmons solo show in Red Bank, New Jersey, the day was more about personality than pyrotechnics. Zach performed an original song during soundcheck — charmingly titled “Dad’s A Dork” — and received a few coaching tips from Simmons. What followed was less a crash course in roadie work and more a blend of offbeat life advice, including stories of Simmons’ youth, his business strategies, and even a tangent about losing his virginity (which, depending on your tolerance for rock-star oversharing, was either cringe or classic).
One of Zach’s official duties? Handing Simmons a red Solo cup filled with cream — a prop used in one of his more surreal stage routines.
It wasn’t exactly the grueling world of rock ’n’ roll logistics. It was more like a strange, semi-scripted hangout with one of the most polarizing figures in music — part TED Talk, part fan fantasy camp.
Still, for Rosado, the point wasn’t to learn how to coil cables or push amps. It was about making memories with his son while he still could. The price was steep, but in his eyes, it bought something priceless.
So, while the internet may never stop side-eyeing Gene Simmons’ ability to put a price tag on literally everything, one fan walked away with a once-in-a-lifetime story — and no regrets.
Because in the end, that’s what Simmons has always sold best: not just music, but myth. And for at least one fan, $12,495 bought a front-row seat to the spectacle.
