He screamed his way into metal history. Then cancer tried to silence him for good. Now, for the first time, Chuck Billy—the iconic frontman of Bay Area thrash legends Testament—tells the whole truth in his unflinching memoir, Holding My Breath: The Two Testaments of Chuck Billy, publishing November 10, 2026, from Permuted Press.
This is not your typical rock memoir. Structured as two interlocking testaments, the book traces the full arc of a life lived at maximum volume—and then something louder than any riff: the fight to stay alive. The Old Testament plunges readers into the explosive birth of Bay Area thrash metal, the formation of Testament, the rivalries, the brotherhood, and the reckless, glorious chaos of becoming one of the genre’s most powerful voices.
The New Testament is something rarer and more raw—a frontman at 38, blindsided by a devastating cancer diagnosis, drawing on his Native American and Mexican-American heritage, spiritual healers, visions, and the fierce love of a metal community.
At the center of that community: the legendary Thrash of the Titans benefit concert—one of the most galvanizing moments in heavy metal history—which rallied old rivals into brothers and helped ignite a genre revival while keeping Chuck Billy in the fight.
“This book is about two versions of me that are really just one story,” says Billy. “The guy who thought he was invincible, and the guy who learned how fragile life really is.”
Co-written with Dave Erickson, Holding My Breath delivers the unfiltered insider story of thrash metal’s rise alongside a deeply human account of mortality, miraculous recovery, cultural identity, and chosen family. It is, equally, a gift to lifelong Testament fans and to anyone who has ever faced the unthinkable—and refused to let go.
“Chuck Billy is a major influential voice in the thrash metal scene. Permuted Press is thrilled to be publishing his remarkable personal journey.” — Anthony Ziccardi, Publisher of Permuted Press
The book features a foreword by Rob Halford (Judas Priest) and an afterword by Randy Blythe (Lamb of God)—two of metal’s most revered voices bearing witness to Chuck Billy‘s enduring legacy.
You can pre order the book here.
Chuck Billy is the powerhouse lead singer of TESTAMENT, one of thrash-metal’s original Bay Area legends since the ’80s. He beat cancer in 2001 and came back stronger, weaving his Native American (Pomo) roots into his life and lyrics. Fourteen studio albums in, he has been honored with a California State Assembly recognition for his positive influence on Native communities, was part of The Smithsonian National Museum of The American Indian’s exhibition ” Up Where We Belong: Native Musicians In Popular Culture,” and won “Best Music Video” at the American Indian Film Festival for “Native Blood.”
