Beartooth frontman Caleb Shomo recently sat down for an extensive, deeply personal interview on the “Disrespectfully” podcast to discuss his long and difficult journey toward embracing his sexuality. Following his public announcement in May that he is “a proudly gay man”, which came after the end of his 14-year marriage, the singer elaborated on the severe trauma and internalized homophobia he experienced while growing up in a strict religious environment and navigating the early Christian metalcore scene.
The vocalist explained that as the son of a preacher, his childhood was defined by rigid evangelical values. He described how these early teachings framed homosexuality as a curable sickness, a belief system that deeply damaged his self-perception.
However, Shomo emphasized that his entry into the heavily Christian-dominated alternative music scene of the mid-2000s exacerbated these harmful ideologies.
“…Probably even more damaging than that [religious] upbringing was being involved in a music scene, in that really wild Christian era of the mid-late 2000s that I came up in. You know, like adjacent to Underoath and all that stuff, that at the time was very, very Christian and very evangelical, and very intense. And I was involved in this music scene, where I was the youngest. And I was, you know, 14 when I got into this scene, hanging out with a lot of older people, who are very evangelical devout Christians,” Shomo recounted (as transcribed by theprp).
“And I was a Christian myself, but that just in hindsight leads to some crazy s**t. Like literally being 16-years-old on a ‘Warped Tour‘ being outside of our bus while this group of people is trying to pray the gay out of one of our crew members, while I’m like there, just like, ‘Okay this is it. This is what is true, this is what we do.’ And it was so f**king traumatizing and terrifying,” he continued.
He continued, detailing how the strict gender segregation and repressed sexual environment within those circles complicated his understanding of relationships and intimacy. He also noted how touring full-time from the age of 15 severely stunted his emotional development, leaving him without the normal avenues for self-exploration.
“And also the way you’re raised is you don’t really have any platonic relationships with women. It’s like there are men’s groups, there are girls groups, you grow up in your thing. And the way the community interacts in general, as well being like these horny repressed Christians, is well, you can’t have sex before you’re married and you’ll go to hell for that. So, you know, people are courting each other very young without much understanding of themselves and you just follow the model,” he stated.
When asked by the hosts if he ever questioned his sexuality during his youth, the Beartooth frontman confirmed that he experienced those feelings “all the time,” but lacked the context to understand them. He shared a childhood memory of excitedly choosing a “girl’s ring” at a department store, only to throw it out the bus window the next day after facing intense ridicule from his peers.
“So, my first core memory of what I recognize is that was when I was probably six or seven and my mom [and my older brother…] we were at some department store, like Kohl’s, and there were these cheap rings, and we thought they were really cool. And my mom was like, ‘Okay, you guys can get one.’ And [my brother] picked a guy’s ring and I picked a girl’s ring. And he’s like, ‘You know that’s a girl’s ring.’ And I was like, ‘Oh, I don’t know. I just love it,’ And I remember It was half-silver, half-gold and had a diamond in the middle. I just loved it and I loved the way it made me feel. And I wore it all day and then the next morning on the bus I remember just getting ridiculed by the kids, like ‘That’s a girls ring!’ I just freaked out and didn’t know what was going on and f**king threw it out the window. It was like, ‘F**k, don’t do that. Whatever that is, let’s keep that away.’ To me, what that was, was this very strong feminine side that I have, but that’s just not the vibe in Ohio in the Christian world. And then growing up, the older you get, and then hanging out with a lot of older people, and just conversations constantly reminding you how f**king weird it is to be gay, or to do anything remotely gay or feminine, or anything like that. So that feeling that I had, which I now understand was my sexuality, I just viewed and compartmentalized as just self-hatred. It’s just this thing that’s evil in me and okay, you fight this with all of your might. And that’s the right thing to do. You f**king pray about it. And I came up with methods to keep it at bay that are so f**ked now thinking about it.”
Shomo admitted that he relied on dangerous coping mechanisms, including substance abuse and suicidal ideation, to avoid confronting his truth. But once he began to break down those internal barriers, the acceptance came rapidly.
“…I basically was able to verbalize that like, ‘No, I think the way that I feel about girls, I feel about guys.’ I do. And there’s something there that I’ve been running from for a long f**king time. And I don’t think I want to run anymore. And then after that the f**king hinges got ripped off. Like it just was so fast, so fast. And then everything starts to make sense. And then I was able to stop hating myself so much — at least in some ways — and start to unpack everything. And immediately, you know, I got into therapy. And you know, I have very severe ADHD. And I understand, after a lot of life, that if I’m not doing very certain things in my daily routine to keep that at bay, it’s easy for me to kind of like spiral out and go back into a hole and then just bury everything back down. So I was like, I’m going to take this really f**king seriously. And therapy, exercise, eating good, sunshine, good sleep, like being creative, these are all really important things.”
Reflecting on the broader landscape of the heavy metal scene, the vocalist pointed out the distinct lack of visible queer representation, highlighting the bravery it takes to live authentically in such a space.
“…Within our music scene, you know to be gay in any public forum is very scary, especially in the United States, and especially in our music scene. I mean, we have Rob Halford, and that was in the ’90s. You know, that’s a different time, different world, different scene, but I’m sure I’m not the only one,” he concluded.
Earlier in March, Disturbed frontman David Draiman publicly stepped up to give his support for the young singer. Taking to X (formerly Twitter), Draiman praised Shomo‘s bold self-expression, comparing his flamboyant new style to some of the greatest legends in rock history.
“Some of the greatest frontmen of all time have never held anything back, fully embracing their own aspects of flamboyance and expressing themselves as powerfully as they knew how.”
“Bowie, Mercury and so many others, took rock to a level only few dared to go, and did it with power, class and grace. I have watched Caleb Shlomo, the singer of Beartooth, become one of the most formidable young frontmen in rock. The song is great, the video is great, and the band is firing on all cylinders.”
“Bowie, Mercury and so many others, including yours truly, are PROUD OF YOU.”
Meanwhile, Attila vocalist Chris Fronzak found himself in hot water after making a ho**phobic remark directed at the Caleb. Fronzak initially posted a since-deleted message on X stating: “Looks like Caleb Shomo dropped the ‘S.’”
Facing immediate backlash from the rock and metal community, the Attila frontman walked back his comments on Tuesday, March 3, issuing a lengthy, multi-part apology explaining his skewed perspective on internet humor.
“I would like to formally apologize for my tweet about Caleb Shomo.”
“I meant it as a joke, but it didn’t come across that way. I don’t know what he’s going through at the moment, but I wish him the best. The world has too much hate [right now] & I don’t want to add any fuel to that fire.”
“People will probably twist this into more negativity, but I am being honest. I meant it as a joke, not a jab at gay people. I personally thought it was lighthearted but I suppose that’s subjective. From my perspective – I get death threats daily for over a decade. People call me horrific things & make up terrible stories. Horrible stuff every day. My perspective is skewed, the internet has desensitized me so I thought it was a 1/10 light joke.”
“The reality is, people are struggling in their own ways, and jokes are subjective. You never know what someone is going through. Therefore, I am sorry, and I will work towards thinking about things deeper before I just word-vomit s**t into this bird app. Love yall.”
